Wednesday, June 29, 2011

To Downward Dog Or To...........

I have purchased a traditional MAGIC 8 BALL for my home and one for the office and I have loaded a MAGIC 8 BALL app for my phone for all other occasions. So it occurs to me that certain questions should probably not be asked. For instance, Should I slap the crap out of my annoying co-worker? And if the Magic 8 ball answer is “Signs point to yes” or “It is decidedly so” I could get fired and then I would not be able to afford internet service and the blog would go away. So I will stay away from questions that will get me fired or put into jail.

Ok…...... question for the Magic 8 ball. Should I blow off Yoga class tonight to go have hot monkey sex with my boyfriend? Shakey Shakey Shakey..... Magic 8 ball says: Cannot predict now. Oh come on!!!! Well fine……. I will ask again in a little bit. Should I blow off Yoga class tonight to have hot monkey sex with my boyfriend? Shakey Shakey Shakey..... Magic 8 Ball says: It is decidedly so.
Why thank you so much Magic 8 ball!!!!!

Monday, June 27, 2011

Funday Monday

So the first day of the magic 8 ball experiment and…....well...…… I blow it. I don't do what the Magic 8 Ball says to do and it goes really bad for me. I spent the weekend, well not the whole weekend but a part of the weekend cleaning my windows and I finally got them all sparkly and then I wake this morning (Monday) and we had a huge rain storm overnight and now they are all spotty again. See this is my KARMA for not listening to the Magic 8 Ball. So just to make sure I burn it into my brain. I WILL LISTEN TO WHAT THE MAGIC 8 BALL TELLS ME TO DO! I WILL LISTEN TO WHAT THE MAGIC 8 BALL TELLS ME TO DO! I WILL LISTEN TO WHAT THE MAGIC 8 BALL TELLS ME TO DO!

It’s another Manic Monday at my job and I’m feeling, oh I don’t know, a little bored and tad bit rebellious. I have this co-worker who has this one pet peeve. She can’t stand it when people fill up the printer with paper and leave the wrapper that the paper comes in just sitting on the counter. It makes her CRAZY! So I, like any good co-worker, have been collecting all the paper wrappers for one glorious work moment. And I’m kinda thinking’ today just might be the day.

Guess I shall have to ask the Magic 8 Ball if today is the day. Magic 8 Ball is today the day that I should decorate my co-workers desk with all of the copy paper wrappers I have been saving? Shakey Shakey Shakey……..Magic 8 Ball says: It is decidedly so. Well this is gonna be a funday Monday after all!!!! I will have to wait till she leaves for the day to hatch my plan but it will be so worth it! I also know to expect a payback at some point. Thank you Magic 8 Ball for the Funday Monday!!!!!

Thursday, June 23, 2011

1st Day Of Magic 8 Ball Experiment

It was a long day at work and what is now needed is a glass of wine and some relaxation. I shall plop myself down on the couch and watch the hummingbird feeding frenzy going on outside my window. Wow my windows are dirty. This is the perfect opportunity to ask the Magic 8 Ball a question. Alright..... shakey shakey........Magic 8 Ball should I clean my filthy windows? Magic 8 Ball Says: Outlook Not so Good. Well that is not good cause my windows are DIRTY. What possible harm could it do to clean them anyway?

I'll just grab my Windex and paper towels. It is now a half hour later and it is quite apparent that this Magic 8 Ball might just be.......... well.......Magic.....or at the very least psychic. And I should be listening to it when it gives me answers because now I have made a complete mess of my windows.

You know that commercial where the birds laugh because the glass is so clean that it looks like the sliding glass door is open and the bird flies into it......not gonna happen with my windows cause they are a streaky effing mess! So...... sitting here and looking out my windows.............Outlook Not So Good.

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

The Magic 8 Ball Experiment

You know it’s not like my life is truly screwed up. But it’s not like it isn’t either. I find myself here in this place. It’s not a bad place but it most certainly is not the place I imagined myself to be say 20 years ago. 20 years ago I imagined myself married to a great guy, I had a great job, lived in a great house and everything was GREAT! Reality in 2011 is I am not married but I am dating a GREAT guy. I have an ok job but it isn't my dream job and I don’t live in a great house. This of course makes me question my decisions along the way. What were my motivations and how did I make these decisions? Is there a better way to make decisions and since some of the decisions I made have turned out horrible perhaps I should experiment with a better way of making decisions.

How do people make decisions? Careful contemplation? Knee jerk reactions? Gut Feel? Pro-Con list? Trip to a therapist? Darts on a dart board.......... or asking the MAGIC 8 BALL?
Which leads me to this life experiment. For the next year I will base my decisions on answers from a MAGIC 8 BALL. It could be the stupidest thing I have ever done or it could turn out to be the smartest and I will certainly learn some lessons along the way. I am sure it will be humorous and I invite you along on my journey.